Military News
Dual military Family watches child grow up through pictures, videos
By Sgt. Brandon Little, Task Force XII PAO, MND-B
Apr 1, 2008 - 6:08:36 PM


Family members take care of deployed couple's daughter

Blackanthem Military News
Sgt. Lindsey Souza, the training and operations noncommissioned officer for Troop R, 4th Squadron, 3rd Armored Cavalry Regiment., points to her favorite picture of her daughter, Taylor. She and her husband, Staff Sgt. Stephen Kelley, are one of several deployed married couples, with children, in the squadron. (U.S. Army photo by Sgt. Brandon Little, TF XII PAO, MND-B)
CAMP TAJI, Iraq - Sgt. Lindsey Souza and Staff Sgt. Stephen Kelley, a married couple in Troop R, 4th Squadron, 3rd Armored Cavalry Regiment, spent the morning of their deployment, with Family and friends, trying to keep their moods upbeat and not think about what awaited them in the next few hours.
   
As time for them to leave grew near, they said their goodbyes and prepared to leave, but they knew they would be leaving a part of themselves behind; that part was a three-year-old little girl named Taylor.
   
Souza and Kelley are just one of several deployed couples who have to rely on Family members back home to take care of little ones they had to leave behind.
   
"Leaving her was the hardest thing I've ever done," said Souza, the training and operations noncommissioned officer for Troop R and a native of Kailua, Hawaii. "We decided it would be best if we said our goodbyes to Taylor at our house, instead of on post right before we left."
   
As they made their way to the airport, they had to mentally prepare themselves for not only their first deployment, but for all the time and memories they would miss with their little girl, said Kelley, a maintenance section sergeant in Troop R and a native of Clark Summit, Pa.
   
"My father was visiting from Hawaii, and we had to take him to the airport before we went to post," said Souza. "I got pretty emotional along the way and I cried a lot; but once we got to the airport the mood got lighter and we were able to say our goodbyes."
   
Kelley's father, David, took them to their unit staging area and then he told them goodbye and stay safe. David and his wife Rene live in Fort Worth, Texas, and have custody of Taylor while the couple is deployed.
   
Souza and Kelley had a lot of things to take care of during the pre-deployment process. In addition to deciding who should take care of Taylor, they also had to close out bills, sell a car and figure out who would watch over their newly purchased house.
   
"I think it would have been a little easier if one of us stayed behind, but that was never an option we wanted to take," said Souza. "We really appreciate all the help our Families have given us and we realize how much pressure it would have been for the spouse left behind."
   
"It's difficult for any parent to be separated from their children, but I know it's extremely difficult for troops, like (Souza and Kelley), who have to leave their children with other Family members," said Capt. Jeffrey Hernandez, the Troop R commander and a proud father. "A deployment can be especially difficult for the parents of young children because they miss so much of the child's life."
   
Hernandez, who is on his second deployment, says his three children are handling his deployment very well so far.
   
Since Souza and Kelley began their deployment, they have missed Taylor's third birthday and the entire holiday season, but their Family tries to keep them involved.
   
"Being away for the holidays was really hard because this is the first Christmas she really understood Christmas gifts," said Kelley. "Our Families took plenty of pictures and sent us videos but it's not as good as being there."
   
"I know sometimes are more difficult for them than others," said Hernandez, who hails from McAllen, Texas. "Sometimes when they call their daughter she might not want to talk or might want to talk with one of them more than the other."
   
This deployment isn't the first time they have had to leave their daughter behind, but it will definitely be the longest.
   
"We'd spent about a month away from her (for deployment training) last year, but that was nothing compared to right now," said Kelley. "Last year, when we got back from training, it took a while for her to get use to being around us again."
   
Being deployed together has allowed them to help each cope with missing their daughter, said Souza.
   
"When I've had a bad day at work, and I really miss Taylor, my husband can tell by the look on my face when I'm looking at pictures," said Souza. "He helps me get through the rough times and I try to do the same for him."
   
Souza and Kelley go on leave in April but they both say leaving little Taylor will probably be harder this time than it was at the beginning of the deployment.
   
When both parents are deployed, they must rely on help from close Family and friends to take care of their children, but they must rely on each other to get through the difficult days.
   
"So far I'm enjoying my deployment, especially since I have my husband here with me," said Souza. "I miss my daughter a lot, but I know what we're doing here is really important. I'm really excited about the idea of getting back home after the deployment and having our Family back together again."

ADDITIONAL PHOTOS:

 
Staff Sgt. Stephen Kelley, a section sergeant for Troop R, 4th Squadron, 3rd Armored Cavalry Regiment., points to his favorite picture of his daughter, Taylor. Since Kelley and his wife, Sgt. Lindsey Souza, are both deployed, Taylor is currently living with Kelley's father in Fort Worth, Texas. (U.S. Army photo by Sgt. Brandon Little, TF XII PAO, MND-B)
Staff Sgt. Stephen Kelley (right) and Sgt. Lindsey Souza pose for a picture with their daughter, Taylor, the day of their deployment to Iraq. (Courtesy Photo)

Staff Sgt. Stephen Kelley and Sgt. Lindsey Souza hug their daughter, Taylor, one last time before leaving for the deployment. (Courtesy Photo)